Comments on: Avoid Putting your Bridesmaids & Groomsmen in Debt

By: Alaura

Alaura — Wed, 14 Dec 2011 06:44:31 +0000

Hey Natalie, my fiance’ and i have been together for 2 years and we’ve been planning our wedding for a few months now. My mom isn’t rich, my dad passed recently and my soon to be father in law is a lying cheapskate. What i’m getting at is we have to pay for pretty much our entire wedding by ourselves. The way it started out it looked pretty inexpensive, I even reassured my man that i would keep a good budget so we didn’t over spend. But the more I get into my planning, with Reception Hall, decorations, party favors, guest book, cake items..etc. it may just be a little too much for me to handle We have the date set for 2 years from now to make sure we’ve saved up enough, but it’s hard with him working and me as a stay at home mom with our 11 month old.. and i’m just completely unsure of what to do. I have my sister as my M-O-H and my honey has his best friend as the Best Man. We have 4 bridesmaids and 4 groomsmen. I want a semi-traditional wedding but i don’t think we can handle the costs. Our ceremony is planned to be at a beautiful public park and we’re doing our own catering with cake and dancing at the hall. But this just seems like too much. I’m of age to go to Las Vegas but not to have fun I found out last night my fiance’ would rather elope in Vegas, but i still want my big wedding, i mean my dress is already picked out among many other important things, what could you suggest i do? i am really at a loss here

By: Indian Jewelry

Indian Jewelry — Tue, 01 Nov 2011 23:02:30 +0000

Wow. Those are one of things you don’t realize the cost until someone explicitly puts it out there for you.

This is something all brides should be warned of! Don’t forget to mention any of the fancy jewelry they’ll have to buy or the nice watches they’ll want to show off with.

Other costs could be opportunity costs of rehearsing, etc…

By: gifts tips

gifts tips — Sun, 13 Feb 2011 15:50:42 +0000

The skill of choosing presents is underrated. After all, the majority of us have extremely stressful lives, and we would just as soon grab the latest and greatest on-sale item at the local department shop rather than taking some time to truly choose the right present.

By: Natalie

Natalie — Sun, 02 Jan 2011 16:13:53 +0000

My husband and I originally planned a more traditional wedding, but as wedding costs kept rising and no one else could help with costs, we eventually scrapped it and did a shotgun wedding. (Yes it was in Vegas, but since we live there, I don’t think that counts. ) We took two weeks to get ready and we got married just after midnight on Jan 1. I decorated the house with after Christmas decorations in silver and white. My Husband-to-be and his best man rented a tux. I told my maid of honor to wear black and white. We paid for a pastor at one of the hotels to come to my house and do the event. Her husband did the photography. We bought a couple of party trays and several magnums of Asti Spumante. I bought a nice silver and white ballgown from a department store. We invited about 25 of our closest friends and family. There weren’t any extra parties or gift exchanges aside from a few wedding gifts from our registry. I don’t think we spent more than $1000 on the entire event including everything but the rings. The only expense the party members had was the tux rental and optional gifts. I couldn’t have had a more beautiful and meaningful event. The pictures turned out great and I still look back fondly on the event 8 years later. The only thing I might have done differently if I had to do it again was splurge for a real wedding dress.

When our best man got married he chose a destination wedding. Although he gave everyone plenty of time to plan and save for the event, it was in 2009, a bad economic year and over half of his original guests had to cancel. Although his parents paid for a big wedding, it ended up just being family and exactly 5 friends. That year I lost my job too and if my husband wasn’t the best man I’m not sure if we would have gone. Attending that wedding cost us over $1000 with travel, hotel, gift and tux rental. (The cost of the bachelor party was just the cost of a night at the bar divided by everyone but the groom and so wasn’t terribly expensive.) Unfortunately, I had to skip getting a shower gift as well and felt really embarrassed being the only one there with no gift, but it couldn’t be helped. Although the location, dress, dinner, cake, etc. were beautiful, I wonder if they had as memorable an event since hardly anyone could attend.

I know this is only anecdotal information, but I hope it illustrates the point that the enjoyment of an event is not related to the cost.

By: Bristol Wedding

Bristol Wedding — Thu, 11 Nov 2010 08:33:04 +0000

thanks to you for posting this, now I know that being a bride’s maid is expensive.. If my friend who is asking me to be a bride’s maid truly is my friend, she will understand and not get mad when I say “No!” What are you willing to give up to say ‘yes’ to debt you can’t afford? Lunch for six months? Food for your pet? A few months of social activities? That trip you’ve been planning to visit your family? Badly needed brakes for your car?” After a few lunchless months or a fender- bender because you couldn’t stop, you may begin to resent your newlywed friend. Either way, you risk jeopardizing the friendship. If you decline, at least you still have your money.

By: BrokeBridesmaid

BrokeBridesmaid — Sun, 29 Aug 2010 03:06:32 +0000

Wow! I had no idea what I was getting into when I agreed to be in my friend’s wedding.

Bridesmaid dress: $220
(needed alterations but because they sent me the wrong size two weeks before the wedding, I negotiated them resizing the dress for free, thanks be to God)

Flight to Wedding: $220

Hotel for three nights (Rehearsal is two days before wedding): $280

Rental Car: $125

Hair and Makeup (optional, I opted out): $145

Wedding Gift: $50

I have just been informed that I need specific shoes and jewelry although I believe I can fake most of this with stuff I already have… what do they want from us? I also skipped the Bachelorette party because it was out of state.

I plan on eloping.

By: jenninfer

jenninfer — Fri, 18 Jun 2010 03:36:35 +0000

My bride keeps raising the number of people she wants at her Shower. We booked a meal and it cost 18 bucks a person and as the Maid of Honor I put the 500 non refundable deposit on the room. She just told me she is inviting 150 people and the number keeps raising. She doesn’t know everyone at the shower and her parents cant financially help. Her bridesmaids hate me because its gonna cost them about 250 to 300 a person and I’m gonna end up paying over 1000 bucks for this little wedding. I do feel like I’m putting on a wedding. I keep asking her to cut people but she is undecided. I don’t wanna tell her we are breaking the bank. But I’m exhausted.

By: Financial Solutions

Financial Solutions — Tue, 02 Mar 2010 10:00:17 +0000

I have been in 2 weddings, and just got married myself last year. I agree with many of your points. Thanks for nice post

By: Slinky

Slinky — Thu, 25 Feb 2010 23:50:42 +0000

After being subjected to a lot of ridiculousness from a friend who got married last year, I’ve been keeping bridesmaid costs in mind as I planned my wedding. I’ve told my girls they can wear any dress they want as long as it’s long, black, and formal. They can wear something they’ve got or buy something new or sew it themselves, doesn’t matter. I don’t care what they wear for shoes, jewelry or accessories. There was one accessory I wanted them all to have, so I bought really nice ones as their bridesmaid gifts. I’m paying for everyone’s hair and makeup. I’m also nixing the whole bridal shower thing. I don’t want or need one. I think that brings costs down to a pretty reasonable level.

I really think the nitpicking of brides about how people’s hair and makeup are done and whether everyone has matching shoes and jewelry and what color they’ve painted their fingernails is so ridiculous. Bridesmaids are people too.

By: Credit Card Chaser

Credit Card Chaser — Fri, 12 Feb 2010 06:31:01 +0000

Definitely an almost impossible thing to say no to if asked. Some weddings can get even more expensive for the wedding party if the bride and groom opt for a destination wedding too!